Both the boys went to the same school for about 6 months, until we had issues with Thomas' teacher and their way of doing things, and they, for lack of better words, kicked him out.
We took him from a very strict learning type of school and put him into a Montessori type school and he thrived. He turned into a child we have never seen. He grew in ways that were just beautiful. He went from having a personal nanny, to an in home day care that ended up betraying him, to the strict school to the Montessori school and he made it through it all. For the most part, unscathed.
Christopher is still at the one school, and we have made the decision to not pass him into the teacher's class that Thomas had so many difficulties with. Christopher is my baby, and he's had health issues, he's had speech issues and he thrives on structure. But I sense that he misses his big brother, I sense that he wants to be in the same school as his big brother. But I am worried I am making the wrong decision.
Christopher will join his big brother at the Montessori type school and I am worried. I fear he will have a hard time adjusting. I fear it will not be challenging enough for him as he is learning his ABC's, 123's and he even knows the colors of a Japan flag, the China flag and the Russian Flag.
I fear, I fear, I fear. I won't always be the perfect mom, and I can't always be expected to make the right decisions. But I pray I am making the right choice, for him. I pray that he will thrive and continue to learn and show his intelligence through his creativity.
I hope that the cross at the crossroads is just a over reaction of my overly protective mommying to my baby.
13 comments:
Oh sending momma hugs your way. So tough. Just know it will be fine. You all will be fine. Love you.
Take your time to decide, this is an important issue. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Take care!
None of us can be perfect - try as we may. Parenting is a ongoing learning process complicated by the fact that ever child requires different needs. You'll find the path that works for him and the rest of you. But don't be too hard on yourself if it takes an extra try or two. Kids do bounce back, especially when they have a mom who is sincerely doing her best as I know you are.
We are in a similar boat. I sent the twins to a different school this year. I made the decision to move them to the same school as the other kids, and I decided to move them up to first grade rather than have them repeat like I had planned when I first put them in. I keep doubting, doubting, doubting wondering if I'm making the right choice. EHHHH.
I think that you worrying about the right choices will make you more aware of how the choices are affecting your boys & by being aware you will know right away if the choices are the right ones for him. If you notice they aren't, you can change them. You are a wonderful mama, you can tell by the desire to want them to do well & succeed. Go with you gut, it will lead you to where they need to be :)
He may live it just, because his brother is there. You can always change back later if is doesn't work.
Sometimes being a parent really sucks. Nobody tells you about the hard decisions you are going to have to make. Holding a tiny life in your hands, knowing your decisions will shape them in the future, is so difficult. One thing I've learned is that if the decision is a hard one, then it's probably the right one. Doing the hard things is what makes you a good parent. Yes, we all make mistakes, but there is nothing that isn't fixable. We try, sometimes we fail. And then we try again.
ooo i have been where you are and i send huge hugs! i did it for tilly with special schools and now a year on i have done it with mainstream schools for poppy who starts in september and the process and worry was off the scale both times! my husband is so much calmer and just says, 'jane, they will be fine anywhere regardless of us!' i wish i could adopt this calm but i am a mum and it doesnt come with the territory! with my mums hat away and my primary teachers hat on i have to say that a more open, playbased, imaginative approach works brilliantly for all children regardless of a liking for structure...within that system there will be a structure all its own and in my many years of teaching 5 yr olds, i think its the only way to go, everyone is encouraged! the other way, the learn you r's way can alienate so many to learning. does that help? best of luck, please keep reposting on this as i really want to know how it all goes now! xxx
I'm sure you haven't made the decision to move him without really thinking about it, and perhaps he will also blossom just as his brother has! :)
Day by day .. been there done this.
You will know if happiness is in your home, or if there are changes to be made.
Take a deep breath Mom, you are doing great!
I've been contemplating a similar "hope I don't do the wrong thing" post. I think we just have to know our kids, trust our instincts and pray for peace in our decision.
Tough decisions we face as parents. I have found that most things seem to work out for the best.
I don't think I even figured out that this post was new the other day. Arrghhh... I feel your pain, momma. I get crazy in the head too when it comes to my baby's and what's best.
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