There are so many things in my life that I could say have made my life dramatically different, from divorces to marriages to the birth of my sons they said I would never have!
But the very 1st thing that comes to mind is a day waaaaayyyyy back when. I was ten. I woke up in the middle of the night....voices, strange voices and noises I couldn't describe. I walked into the living room and saw them, in my house. Paramedics, and a gurney....taking my dad.
I remember it like it was yesterday. (When in fact it's been close to 27 years ago.) I walked up to my dad....I remember the paramedics saying to him, "Sir? You are going to have to put your leg flat" and my dad saying Okay. And a moment later he would bend his legs again and they told him again to put his legs flat.
My Mom, telling me they were going to take him to the hospital and I heard her tell them, "He fell out of bed, and his disoriented" I remember him telling me "Be a good girl Missy" Which is my nickname, my mom still calls me that today. And that was the last thing my dad ever said to me! The neighbors came to stay with my brother and I while my mom went to the hospital.
Next I heard, "He had emergency brain surgery and is in a coma". I went to see him, I was 10, and they made special permissions for my brother and I to go into the CCU to see him. The nurse, telling me "This isn't really how your dad is, I want you to remember your dad the way he was". I walked in, I remember seeing a patch over the side of his head that said "Open do not push". I remember the tubes, the sound of the ventilator. I remember the heat of his skin, burning up, he had nothing on but a small towel and he was roasting! And I remember my mom, crying and telling me to talk to him, that he can hear me. I told him that I was there and I missed him and loved him and hoped he came home soon! I remember hugging him, and then it was time to go! That would be the last time I saw my dad!
I remember trying to carry on in like normal, my mom crying, but trying to be normal. And I remember coming home from school, watching the end of General Hospital (my mom always watched that and it was on when I got home from school) I remember eating a piece of cheese, and I remember hearing my mom on the phone....a one sided conversation....
"Oh, I see. Was it his heart? (My dad had an artificial steal heart valve, and had been through 2 open heart surgeries) Okay, I understand, Thank You."
I remember my mom coming up to me on the couch, and hugging me and telling me that my dad had just died. I remember not knowing what to do, I was hurt, and I was angry and I wanted to see him again, and I wanted so much for it to all be a lie! And I remember dropping my cheese and the dog stealing it out of my lap.
From that moment my life would never be the same.
I remember everyone talking about how it was gone, he was gone, he was gone. HE WASN'T!!! I remember yelling that....."HE'S NOT GONE! He's here.....as I grabbed for my heart, he will ALWAYS be here, and I hate everyone saying he's gone" and I remember running to my room and crying and crying and crying....until I didn't think there were any more tears to cry.
I remember my dad's voice, the quietness of him, I remember running to the front door every day saying DADDY and he would pick me up and hug me. And I will always remember just how very special he was, and how his death changed me for a lifetime, and life as I knew it, was never the same! His death made me who I am today, and I often wonder....what if! But that's a post for another day and another time.

I would like to thank
Mama Kat, for without her prompts this post might never have been published. Head on over to her place and see what else she's digging up. (Oh and I didn't count to see if I met the 1000 word mark, anyone willing to do that?)
My Little Miracles